If somebody requested you to checklist essentially the most sensible Bible passages on marriage, the place would you go? Maybe you’d flip to Ephesians 5 and Paul’s mystic theology of marriage. Or perhaps you’d go to Mark 10, the place Jesus grounds what we must do in marriage based mostly on what God created marriage to be. Or perhaps you’d go all the best way again to Genesis 2 to see the very first husband and spouse.
Most likely, you wouldn’t consider 1 Samuel 14, the place God makes use of Jonathan and his armor-bearer to rout a complete military. You gained’t hear this textual content preached at many weddings. Each Jonathan and his armor-bearer are males, the setting is a battlefield, and the battle is battle. However this martial, masculine hierarchy provides us deep knowledge for marital hierarchy — knowledge for each husbands and wives.
Physique-Head from Earlier than the Starting
In any case, Paul tells us each human marriage factors to a wedding extra actual (Ephesians 5:32). God imagined and invented our covenant unions to picture forth his personal covenant relationship with us. Marriage exists as a result of Christ has at all times deliberate to woo and win a bride. Each marriage preaches that actuality, whether or not husband and spouse comprehend it or not.
One of many clearest methods marriage speaks about Christ and his bride is thru the God-appointed roles of husband and spouse. Paul says,
The husband is the pinnacle of the spouse at the same time as Christ is the pinnacle of the church, his physique, and is himself its Savior. (Ephesians 5:23)
Christ is the pinnacle, and the church is his physique. The person is the pinnacle, and his spouse is his physique. Paul states these realities as unalterable information (regardless of how our society militates in opposition to them). Nonetheless, that doesn’t imply the reflection is at all times clear. Dysfunction distorts the picture. The sermon of marriage is heresy if head and physique usually are not wholesome.
So, what does a well-ordered head-body hierarchy appear like? Properly, the dynamics of head and physique usually are not restricted to marriage. A king is the pinnacle of his kingdom. A basic is the pinnacle of his military. A father is the pinnacle of his family. So, we will take a look at body-head relationships exterior of marriage to glean sensible knowledge for a way they operate inside marriage.
And maybe among the finest footage of comfortable hierarchy in Scripture involves us in 1 Samuel 14. Take into account how the story of Jonathan and his armor-bearer illustrates the body-head dynamic that undergirds marriage.
Hierarchy Goes to Battle
The scenario in 1 Samuel 14 is that this. A military of Philistines — with thirty thousand chariots and extra males than “the sand on the seashore” (1 Samuel 13:5) — has attacked Israel. God’s individuals are massively outnumbered. And as a substitute of trusting God to ship, King Saul has performed the idiot and now hides in a cave.
However Saul’s son Jonathan isn’t any craven and refuses to permit the Philistines to proceed to dishonor God and his individuals. So we learn,
Jonathan mentioned to the younger man who carried his armor, “Come, allow us to go over to the garrison of those uncircumcised. It might be that the Lord will work for us, for nothing can hinder the Lord from saving by many or by few.” And his armor-bearer mentioned to him, “Do all that’s in your coronary heart. Do as you want. Behold, I’m with you coronary heart and soul.” (1 Samuel 14:6–7)
Jonathan then devises a take a look at to see if God would certainly combat for them (verses 9–10). After they obtain a constructive signal, we learn,
Jonathan mentioned to his armor-bearer, “Come up after me, for the Lord has given them into the hand of Israel.” Then Jonathan climbed up on his fingers and toes, and his armor-bearer after him. They usually fell earlier than Jonathan, and his armor-bearer killed them after him. (verses 12–13)
God makes use of this preliminary strike by two males to throw your complete military into chaos.
There was a panic within the camp, within the area, and amongst all of the individuals. The garrison and even the raiders trembled, the earth quaked, and it turned a really nice panic. (verse 15)
Ultimately, the Philistines find yourself defeating themselves. And the story concludes, “So the Lord saved Israel that day” (verse 23).
Now, on first look, this story has little to do with marriage. However once we examine the wholesome hierarchy on the middle of 1 Samuel 14, we will glean a lot sensible knowledge concerning the body-head relationship in marriage.
Jonathan the Head
We begin with Jonathan, the pinnacle. An excellent head orients and orders the physique towards a mission together with his presence, phrases, and actions, and he empowers his members to satisfy that function. The top orients and empowers for mission.
Jonathan does this fantastically. He’s a head with jovial ambition for a godly mission and orients his physique to that finish. Saul’s silly cowardice acts as a foil for Jonathan’s daring. Saul disobeys God and hides in worry, whereas Jonathan — like his pal David after him — burns with zeal for God’s honor and, with metal in his backbone, opposes foes innumerable with simply two. It’s onerous to think about Jonathan right here as something however jovial. He has a kingly magnanimity. To borrow the phrases of King Lune of Archenland, Jonathan has a “first in, final out, laughing loudest” form of daring — a jovial ambition.
And that ambition strikes towards a godly mission — to defy the enemies of Yahweh. That mission is grounded in God’s character. Jonathan says, “Allow us to go over . . . for nothing can hinder the Lord from saving by many or by few” (1 Samuel 14:6). Nothing! Jonathan’s religion in God makes him fearless, and when that religion fuels a mission — nicely, God loves to make use of males, husbands, heads like that. What’s extra, Jonathan protects his bold mission from changing into reckless hubris by establishing a take a look at to confirm God’s pleasure in his plan. He rattles the doorknob to see if God will throw vast the door.
Lastly, he doesn’t go it alone. He’s no island. He orients his physique, his armor-bearer, towards the godly mission: “Come, let us go over to the garrison of those uncircumcised” (verse 6). Jonathan presents a beautiful instance of a godly head. However like a ship with out sails, a head with no physique goes nowhere.
His Defend-Bearing Assist
Jonathan’s physique on this story consists of 1 armor-bearer. As a metaphor, an armor-bearer is an efficient picture for a godly spouse. In historical Nordic warfare, girls generally supported males in fight. Male warriors wielded weapons and stormed the sector, whereas the ladies provided becoming female assist. Typically, they introduced up the rear carrying shields, so that they had been referred to as “shield-maidens.” Like the wonderful spouse of Proverbs 31 or Tolkien’s Lúthien, shield-maidens are wearing female power, giggle on the instances to return, and are extra worthwhile than diamonds (Proverbs 31:10, 17, 25).
After all, I’m not advocating that ladies actually go to battle, that women bodyguard presidents, or that wives wield bodily weapons. However as a metaphor, the shield-maiden helps create a class in our imaginations of how a godly spouse can assist her husband.
“Marriage exists as a result of Christ has at all times deliberate to woo and win a bride.”
And Scripture hints at this connection. In Genesis 2:18, the lady is known as the person’s “assist,” ezer in Hebrew — a time period that always describes God, particularly in reference to the picture of a defend. For instance, God known as “the defend of your assist” (Deuteronomy 33:29), or repeatedly within the Psalms, God is “our assist and our defend” (Psalms 28:7; 33:20; 35:2; 115:9–11). Clearly, Scripture carefully associates shields and assist.
And few embody the connection higher than Jonathan’s armor-bearer. After Jonathan expresses his bold mission, his armor-bearer responds with pure poetry: “Do all that’s in your coronary heart. Lengthen your hand. Behold, I’m with you coronary heart and soul” (1 Samuel 14:7, my translation). He receives, affirms, and amplifies the pinnacle’s mission — with grace extra like a dance than a battle.
So it’s in marriage. An excellent physique receives the mission from the pinnacle, affirms or refines it with counsel, and amplifies that mission with assist. And when a spouse shoulders the defend of assist, what military can stand in opposition to her husband? What foe is not going to fall? What dragon can stand in opposition to him? What mission will he shrink back from? The grace on her lips will put metal in his backbone. The assist in her fingers will make their house blossom right into a fruitful backyard.
Simply as a sword wants a defend, the pinnacle wants the assistance of the physique. Adam makes no poetry with out Eve.
Disproportionate Fruitfulness
One remaining commentary from our passage: God rewarded this stunning hierarchy of head and physique with disproportionate fruitfulness. Two buddies, one sword, one defend, rightly ordered, and God put to flight a military as quite a few because the sand on the seashore! God used Jonathan’s jovial ambition and his armor-bearer’s keen submission for the nice of his individuals and the glory of his identify.
And he likes to do the identical in well-ordered marriages. Christian husband and spouse, do you lengthy to see God work the identical form of wonders via you? Would you like his kingdom to advance via your comfortable hierarchy because it did with Jonathan and his armor-bearer?
Man of God, do you notice each interplay you will have along with your spouse declares one thing about how Christ heads his bride — both reality or lies? Each look, each tone of voice, each snap response, each contact. All of your management or abdication, all of your sacrifice or selfishness, all of your loving pursuit or lazy passivity — each time you wage battle for her or in opposition to her — all of it preaches. So domesticate a jovial ambition for a godly mission, and lead your shield-maiden within the cost. Be a “first in, final out, loudest laughing” form of head. Love her like Jesus does.
And girl of God, are you aware that the rhythm and concord of your dance along with your husband tells a story concerning the bride of Christ? Each look, each smile, each phrase, each caress, each meal made, each little one raised, each time you’re taking up a defend at his aspect — all of your fruitfulness or faithlessness, all you assist or sabotage, all of your respect or reproach — all of it speaks. So observe the comfortable self-discipline of keen submission. Obtain his godly mission, hone it to some extent along with your female counsel, after which glorify it, amplify it, make it fruitful and delightful past what he might have ever imagined. Honor him because the church does Christ.
What sort of disproportionate fruitfulness may God be happy to grant our well-ordered marriages if extra Christian husbands had been keen to say, “Come, allow us to. . . . It might be that the Lord will work for us,” and if their devoted wives responded, “Do all that’s in your coronary heart. Behold, I’m with you coronary heart and soul”? Could God make it so.
